Oh, and please drink responsibly …

Sometimes, when I examine a week or a fortnight’s worth of incidents in toyland, I look for a common thread. One wasn’t hard to find in a series of recent stories.

1) According to a Georgia district attorney, Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger bought shots of alcohol for the 20-year-old coed — yes, that’s under the legal drinking age in Georgia — who later accused him of sexual assault.

I think it’s safe to assume that with the liquor flowing in the nightclub, Roethlisberger imbibed, too. That couldn’t have helped his decision-making which, off the field, needs all the help it can get.

2) Santonio Holmes was traded from the Steelers to the Jets after being accused of throwing a glass of booze in a woman’s face. Holmes has a history of substance abuse, and in fact will miss this season’s first four games for violating the NFL’s drug policy. I’m guessing that — somehow — the hooch that went into his mouth contributed to the hooch that allegedly flew into the woman’s face.

3) An obviously inebriated Cowboys owner Jerry Jones was caught on video bad-mouthing former coach Bill Parcells and slamming former Florida quarterback Tim Tebow. The video has gone viral on YouTube and even made it onto ESPN. If Jones hadn’t been so pie-eyed, he just might have noticed the cell phone camera pointed in his direction.

4) Word that a Notre Dame football recruit on spring break who fell to his death from a fourth-floor balcony was “very drunk” was actually news to whom? For shock value, this rates up there with the study that informed us that most people who drive the wrong way on freeways are under the influence of alcohol.

Not sure how this helps his image

A New York Times story on the daughter of Dixie Walker paints a somewhat sympathetic portrait of the Brooklyn Dodgers star who tried to keep Jackie Robinson from breaking baseball’s color line in 1947.

Walker’s circulation of an anti-Robinson petition was unnerving to hear about, Susan Walker said, “because it didn’t fit the man I knew.”

The story quotes a passage from Roger Kahn’s 1993 book, The Era, in which Walker said, “I organized that petition in 1947, not because I had anything against Robinson personally or against Negroes generally. I had a wholesale business in Birmingham (Ala.) and people told me I’d lose my business if I played ball with a black man.”

So, Walker really wasn’t the virulent racist he was made out to be — just a gutless man worried about money.

Thanks, Barry … I think

Speaking of having your image helped, does Mark McGwire really want to be praised by Barry Bonds?

"I have a really good friendship with Mark McGwire and I'm proud of him," Bonds told reporters recently.

According to the book Game of Shadows, it was Bonds’ envy of McGwire’s steroid-fueled performances — and the attendant accolades — that led the Giants star to begin injecting himself with everything from designer steroids to a 'roid created to improve the muscle quality of cattle.

McGwire, back in the game as hitting coach for the St. Louis Cardinals, called Bonds’ comment, “very cool.” I wouldn’t, but then I don’t live in Bonds and McGwire’s obviously irony-free world.

Friday column: For Roethlisberger, another message coming

In the battle of public perception, messages matter.

Georgia district attorney Fred Bright said this week that he wouldn’t prosecute Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger for sexual assault. There wasn’t enough evidence, he said.

The rape kit used on the 20-year-old accuser at the hospital did collect some male DNA, but not enough to be useful, Bright explained. Though the woman sustained injury to the genital area, there was not enough bodily evidence to prove penetration. And the accuser apparently was intoxicated, a fact that would have made it more difficult to secure a guilty verdict.

Bright could have stopped there, but he didn’t.

Instead he made it a point to say, “We do not condone what Roethlisberger did,” adding “we do not prosecute morals. We prosecute crimes.” He also pointed out that Roethlisberger “provided shots of alcohol” for the underage accuser and her friends.

That was one message.

Another message was sent Monday when not a single Steelers exec stood by Roethlisberger when the quarterback read a statement before the TV cameras. Last year, when he was denying another accusation of sexual assault — in this case a civil complaint — Roethlisberger had coach Mike Tomlin and general manager Kevin Colbert on hand.

Tuesday, PLB Sports, a Pittsburgh-based marketing firm with ties to athletes, ended its relationship with Roethlisberger, its company president saying, “Enough is enough. I hope there is a suspension. At some point in time, Ben has got to put himself in the right position and understand what it means to be a celebrity, a quarterback, a Steelers player.”

Consider that a third message.

Of course, Roethlisberger’s side can send messages, too, and did when the quarterback’s high-priced mouthpiece, Ed Garland, announced to the world that the decision not to prosecute had “exonerated” his client.

How’s that line playing in the heartland?

Well, in Findlay, Ohio, hometown of one Benjamin Todd Roethlisberger, a normally popular Steelers jersey — No. 7 — is collecting dust. Complained Findlay merchant Sue Cataline: “We can sell everybody else’s, but not his. We can’t sell any of his stuff.”

With CBS reporting that allegations of a third sexual incident involving Roethlisberger has surfaced, don’t expect a buying spree anytime soon — in Findlay, in Pittsburgh or in Santa Fe.

E-mailed one local reader, a longtime Steelers fan: “Well, I’m a retired psychotherapist, I’m tellin’ ya, this guy is a sexual predator. This isn’t about ‘hooking up.’ It’s about sexual assault.”

That reader isn’t alone in her opinion. Google Roethlisberger and “sexual assault” and you’ll get more than 20,000 hits.

It’s a fact Roethlisberger has avoided prosecution. It’s also a fact that his behavior has tarnished not only his reputation but that of the NFL. That being the case, look for commissioner Roger Goodell to send his own message very soon.

Contact Jim Gordon at gjames43@msn.com.

It's really quite simple

So.

Oregon’s attorney general is nosing into the sweet parachute given departing University of Oregon athletic director Mike Bellotti.

The AG is curious why Bellotti is getting $2.3 million for leaving his job to become an analyst for ESPN.

Like Oregon NEEDS a reason besides the obvious: Bellotti was a successful football coach for the Ducks. Successful D-1 football coaches get any damned thing they want — even when they move on, as they often do, to a cushy A.D. job, and even when they move on from there.

You think I’m kidding? Check out the resignation agreement, which says, "In recognition of his many contributions, UO wishes to assist Bellotti in seeking a transition to other employment opportunities currently available to him."

Why is he getting that money? He was a successful football coach, dammit.

What's a little thing like graduation?

Recommended reading: Leonard Shapiro’s Washington Post piece on the Final Four. The headline? “At Final Four, coaches' integrity and graduation rates will be swept under rug”

Shapiro points out the recent firing of St. John’s basketball Norm Roberts, who restored the program’s honor and credibility but was still fired for — guess what? — not winning enough games. Reading between the lines, fired perhaps for not trying hard enough (read cheating) in order to win.

Shapiro points out West Virginia coach Bob Huggins’ dismal record at graduating players — going back to his days at Cincinnati — and writes, “Maybe this is a new, improved Bob Huggins. But it's far too soon to throw him a parade, even if his team does win on Monday night.”

When Huggins was canned in Cincinnati, the school president cited a “lack of character” in the coach. But if he wins Monday — a day after Easter — watch for most stories about him to concentrate on his career resurrection. not his character.

If we wins, they’ll do more than throw him a parade in West Virginia; they’ll deify him.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/03/30/AR2010033002074.html

Friday column: Giving 'friend' a bad name

I’ve been thinking about the nature of friendship.

My thoughts began with leaks that Tiger Woods’ assignations were arranged — and concealed — in part by the efforts of a childhood friend, Bryon Bell.

Bell apparently arranged for Rachel Uchitel to fly Melbourne for last year’s Australian Open, flew with her — I’m sure he didn’t want her to get lost — and paid for her nights in the Crown Towers Hotel, where Woods was staying.

Texts and e-mails released by another Woods inamorata, a porn actress, indicate Bell also handled her transportation needs. One of the travel-related e-mails Bell sent to Joslyn James was from Bell’s work account — but not to worry. As Bell is president of a business by the name of Tiger Woods Design, I’m confident he’s not in too much trouble with his boss.

How close are Woods and Bell? The golfer was supposed to be Bell’s best man at his December wedding until a certain Thanksgiving Day incident turned Woods into paparazzi catnip.

Woods has said more than once that “nobody” knew about his extra-marital affairs, but that’s obviously not true. If Woods’ purpose in his most recent lie is to protect Bell, it’s a little late for that.

Woods used Bell to deceive his wife and facilitate his affairs. Is that what one does to a friend, turn him into a procurer, into an accessory to adultery? And what kind of friend does this kind of bidding? I guess the kind of friend who ties his entire life to the fame and fortune of another.

This is friendship? Really? It debases the name of friendship.

As slimy as the Woods-Bell uh … brotherhood … seems, I’m not sure it can match that of Ben Roethlisberg and an unnamed “friend” who did sentry duty outside a nightclub bathroom while the Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback was doing … something … to or with a 20-year-old college student.

Was the chum told to guard the bathroom door or did he do so on his own? Was he a veteran of making sure Roethlisberger was uninterrupted in pursuit of casual coitus or was this the first time?

It’s bad enough, of course, if whatever went on in the lavatory was consensual. But if it wasn’t — and the coed has claimed she was sexually assaulted — might the friend’s actions even be criminal?

I’m sure that in Pittsburgh, being Roethlisberger’s buddy/flunkie carries a certain distinction. But I wonder if, whoever this person is, he’s bragging about “his pal Ben” at the moment.

A Confucian saying advises, “Never contract friendship with a man that is not better than yourself.” From a character viewpoint, I’d say Woods and Bell, as well as Roethlisberger and his unnamed sidekick, have all violated that principle.

Contact Jim Gordon at gjames43@msn.com.