Friday column: 'This how you do me?'

I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME?!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO …

Thus tweeted Buffalo wide receiver Steve Johnson’s after dropping a sure touchdown pass Sunday, a play that would have given the Bills an upset victory over Pittsburgh.

Johnson’s reaction brought to mind my struggles with a Ignatius Loyola prayer of dedication recommended to me years ago.

Recognizing God as the source of all things, the prayer offers back to that source all of one’s freedom, memory, intelligence and will for God to use as he sees fit. The prayer ends, “I ask only for your love and your grace, for they are enough for me.”

I have found praying that prayer problematic in this sense: While I understand and do believe that God’s love and grace should be enough for me, I find as say those words that, in truth, I want a little more.

A newer car would be nice. Maybe a house without so many problems. A bit of financial security would be appreciated. I wouldn’t mind a Pulitzer.

Johnson apparently would very much have liked a game-winning touchdown. When he didn’t get it, he tweeted, ostensibly to God. But as his faith tells Johnson that the Almighty already knows his thoughts, it’s safe to assume the tweet was really to Bills fans, to let them know the drop really wasn’t Johnson’s fault — blame the Man Upstairs.

In a world of suffering, it’s easy to make fun of Johnson’s angst over a dropped pass. But it’s worth remembering the wide receiver is only 24 and clearly felt he had let down an entire community. When he said after the game that he would “never get over it — ever,” I’m quite sure he meant it.

But, obviously a little perspective is called for.

There are countless millions of people waking up today who must struggle with their faith, whatever it may be, while confronting soul-shattering losses — of job, health, child, husband, wife. In this life, loss, pain and fear come at us, sometimes in waves. We do what we can to prevent them but sooner or later they come, just the same.

What we can control, one hopes, is our response, and here Johnson should have an edge. He’s an elite athlete, which means he’s already learned that pushing through the hard moments — wind sprints at the end of practice, extra reps when you’re tired, discouraged and want to quit — is where the most progress is made.

What’s true in the athletic realm I believe to be true also in the spiritual.

For people of faith, getting from “And this how you do me?” to “your love and your grace are enough for me,” is a long, arduous journey, and there are frequent drops — for all of us — along the way.

Contact Jim Gordon at gjames43@msn.com.